DIARY OF AN URBAN MILKMAID


PROFILE GUESTBOOK OLD OLDER OLDEST
This evening, the kidlet and I walked over to our neighborhood spaghetti house for a plate of pasta and a good time.

See, I figure since I'm gaining about a pound a day from eating healthfully, an enormous meal of carbs and sodium should be completely fine - if I walk the quarter mile back home after. Yeah. Just the ticket, right there... At this rate, I'll be weighing in at two bills in no time! What was I thinking???

Anyway, things didn't turn out quite as we had hoped. There was a gigantic birthday party going on, so the wait staff was a bit more flustered than usual (high school kids work there) - and things took a long time to arrive at the table. However, our waitress did apologize for the delay - which I thought was a nice touch.

So, we're waiting, and waiting, and running out of conversation - when a woman walks by the table, and lets loose with the most horrific silent-but-deadly fart! It was the kind of fart that had been festering insider her colon for days... I'm certain there was photographic evidence of a thick, green fog in the vicinity of our table. We actually pulled the collars of our t-shirts up over our noses and mouths for about 5 minutes so we could breathe... Sweet mother of god...

******************************************

I haven't done my housework yet. Place is still a sty.

We ended up going to the bookstore, so I could pick up a pack of tarot cards and a book on how to read them. I read cards a lot about 5 years ago. Then, I realized it's all bunk and threw them away. However, one of my former bosses has hired me to be the gypsy-tarot reader for her upcoming birthday party. I figure, if I'm going to get paid, I should at least brush up a little.

"Life Not Worth Living If You Not Take Risk" Brian, QAF



July 21, 2002

Buh Bye!
October 05, 2008

Be Afraid, People.... Really Afraid
September 01, 2008

One Last Bitchfest for the Road
August 24, 2008

Get the Popcorn Ready
July 17, 2008

I'm a Rich Ho-Bag
June 20, 2008



previous next
Marriage is love.

hosted by DiaryLand.com