|DIARY OF AN URBAN MILKMAID|
|With all the death-defying stuff that's going on in my life right now, it seems rather ironic that I was nearly killed on an escalator at the mall this afternoon.
Two complete moron women hauled their wheelchair bound mother onto the escalator, and I didn't see what they'd done until we were half way up...
Of course, I watched in horror, as they set the front wheels down just a half-second too soon, and jammed her chair into the top of the escalator. She stopped moving, but WE didn't. I rammed right into her, and the people behind me rammed into me. We could have all been injured. One of the moron twins said - "well, the elevator wasn't working", and as I passed by I snarled "Yeah. Because there're no elevators in any of the DEPARTMENT STORES".
The kid has her contact lenses. Gosh, they gave her a pair to try for a week and a free bottle of cleaning solution. She couldn't get one of them out this evening, and I got tired of hearing her whining, so I sat her down on the toilet, grabbed her head, jammed her eyelid open and pulled that sucka out myself. She got the other one out...
I Advantaged the pets. They're not speaking to me now.
|Buh Bye! |
October 05, 2008
Be Afraid, People.... Really Afraid
One Last Bitchfest for the Road
Get the Popcorn Ready
I'm a Rich Ho-Bag
|Marriage is love.|