Hmmm... Not really sure what to think of This

I suspect the General will have something to say very soon.


My doctor says I might not have an ulcer after all. She says I could just have such bad GERD that my gut is just really, really sore. I'm supposed to either double my Zantac75, or try Prilosec for a couple of weeks. Now, the Zantac works like a charm. No side effects or anything. However, it doesn't "heal" any ulcers like Prilosec does. But the prilosec could give me headaches or unpleasant gastro-symptoms. Decisions, decision...

She did a blood test for H.Pylori bacteria. Don't know the results yet. I'm also supposed to get an endoscopy. Look. One reason I don't miss dating men, is frankly, I never really enjoyed having anything shoved down my throat. Though I suppose I could insist the endoscopy doctor buy me dinner first.

My doctor says while I'm being endoscopied, I should go ahead and have a colonoscopy done. Yeah. Like I'm going to willingly submit to being skewered like a shish-kabob! My butt cheeks clenched so tight, you coulda bounced a quarter off 'em! "I have another year!" I wailed. She assured me that I'd be so high, I wouldn't care much. Plus, it's just one incident of indignity, instead of two.

I made her promise to avoid sending me to my former boyfriend, the Gastroenterologist. I can just picture the scenerio. "Yes, I remember all those hot nights we spent making love... Now, take a deep breath while I shove this thing up your butt"

January 15, 2004

Buh Bye!
October 05, 2008

Be Afraid, People.... Really Afraid
September 01, 2008

One Last Bitchfest for the Road
August 24, 2008

Get the Popcorn Ready
July 17, 2008

I'm a Rich Ho-Bag
June 20, 2008

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