The kidlet discovered that Gene Simmons would be signing his newest book at the local Borders last evening. Now, she's no Kiss fan - being only 15 and all, but she does appreciate celebrity, and the whole, wild hair, black makeup - pretend satanic stuff plays right into her cartooning of late. She thought she'd like to see Gene, and perhaps get an autograph.

I told her I wasn't willing to shell out $25 for some book by a wrinkly old rocker. She assured me it would be okay - that the Borders personnel told her she didn't need to purchase a book to get an autograph. Hmmmmmmm... Sounded fishy to me, but what the hell.

Anyway, she got dressed up and hopped on the bus to Borders. The signing wasn't until 7:30 - and she got there at 2. I met her after work at about 6, and we had sandwiches in the Cafe.

Okay. I'm going to say something that I hope doesn't offend any rabid Kiss fans. But I spent a few hours in a small, hot bookstore with approximately 200 serious Kiss devotees last night. And I gotta tell ya. It was as if the gates to the trailer parks had swung wide! I don't know when I've seen so many mullets! We were standing in line, next to a six-foot tall woman, who reeked of booze. From time to time, she would screech at the top of her lungs "ANNETTE!!", trying to locate a gal-pal. Her "brothers" finally arrived, smelling of pot - baseball caps on backwards - maybe 12 good teeth between them.

Mostly, it was a fun, good-natured crowd. Americana at its finest, I'd imagine. Everyone there (except me, because Kiss was way after my time) had their own special memories of the band, and I could see this was a really cool thing for them.

As for my kidlet not being required to purchase a book - well, that didn't turn out to be exactly true. However, she talked her way past Gene Simmons' security lady - by telling her she'd been waiting since 2, and we had "money problems" so she couldn't afford a book. Just a piece of paper... So the security lady took pity on my kidlet, and when it was her turn to go up to see Gene, the lady spoke in his ear, and explained the kidlet's tenuous financial situation. I was like, totally hiding in the crowd, because it's just embarassing to have your kid be Gene Simmons' charity autograph case... He was really gracious and nice. He spent a few minutes talking to the kidlet about her cartooning (she had him sign a special cartooning sized paper) - and took a couple of pictures with her. I slinked away, too cheap to buy a book...

July 03, 2003